Bad Restaurant Names

Gary Larson once wrote a Far Side comic with the caption "Nature's way of saying do not touch" or "Nature's way of saying stay away." I forget what it said exactly, and I can't find it online. One of the pics was a psycho-looking guy with a gun or something wearing an animal pool floaty.

Here is a restaurant's way of saying "stay away":

I won't be going there anyway. At least the menu doesn't say "we delivery." Like every other Chinese menu I've seen.

Pickle Festival! OMG!

It will be pickle madness today at the 31st Annual Greenlawn Pickle Festival in Greenlawn.

Why am I telling you about it today? Because I just got an email about it yesterday on behalf of the Horman family's line of pickles, which will be on display at the festival. They do their thing in Glen Cove. Gotta support the locals.

Horman’s Best (booth number 10) will feature samples of all its fresh-from-the-barrel fan favorites including: Honey Mustard, New Dill, Sour, Spicy Sour, Sweet Cajun, Bread & Butter, Horseradish, Red Flannel, and Kosher Dill as well as Pickled Tomatoes and Hot Cherry Peppers.

New York Deli Pickle (booth number 17), now carried by Fairway among others, will debut its jarred line featuring Kosher Dill, Spicy Kosher Dill, Mustard and Horseradish.

Better Link

So I see from the stats feature on blogger that Germany has moved into the second spot of the countries who look at this stupid blog. Must have been the Oktoberfest post.

Guten Tag, my German readers. Hey, can you explain why when I type "drunk German" into a Google image search, 90% of the images are porno? I mean I expect like 50% to be porno for anything, but 90% is a bit high.

I used to know some German and was actually the top German student every year I took it in high school.

Reader:  Stop lying, you liar! We all know you're stupid. And now you're a liar.

That was when I had some intelligence. No longer.

Anyway, I realized that I linked to a Newsday article about Oktoberfest and that Newsday is a $ubscription $ite. Sorry. I get access as a Cablevision customer, so sometimes I forget. Newsday went $ubscription a while ago. Then they came out with an article that said 37 people or something had signed up. Way to go, Newsday!

Here's another post about Oktoberfest events from Long Island Restaurant News. A site like that has so much information it scares me. But they link to me, so I don't feel too bad.

Oktoberfest at Rein


This is pretty cool. Rein at The Garden City Hotel is having a 16-day drunken orgy of Oktoberfest. "Drunken orgy" are my words.

From Newsday:

On Friday Oct. 1, from 6 to 10 p.m., executive chef Steven De Bruyn and chef de cuisine Kevin Buckenberger will serve a lavish, beer-friendly buffet. (De Bruyn is from Belgium, so he knows a thing or two about beer.) During the cocktail hour, the hotel’s English garden will be transformed into a traditional biergarten. Draft Paulaner Oktoberfest and Franziskaner Dunkle Weisse will be served, along with grilled bratwurst, beer-braised sauerkraut and passed (by lederhosen-clad servers) hors d’oeuvres.

Tickets for the open-seated dinner event are available by pre-booking by  Sept. 30 for $47 per person (plus tax and 15-percent tip) or, on the evening of the event, for $55 per person. 

I would love to check that out. Don't know if I'll make it.

I've eaten at Rein, which is the main restaurant at the hotel since Polo closed. Boo. It was fine. Whatever. But that German crap sounds interesting.

No info on beer wench outfits. Oh my.

Fancy McDonald's

Finally got around to trying the fancy dancy McDonald's in New Hyde Park. There's a lot of info about it online. So I'll just say a couple things.

The house was built circa 1875 and belonged to the Denton family, which apparently has roots back to when the Town of Hempstead was founded. There's a plaque inside with the 1875 date. A quick property records search (because I can do things like that) says the house was built in 1921. What does this discrepancy mean? I don't know.

So the place was originally a private residence, but starting in the 50's the property was owned by different corporations. Some people have said it was an Italian restaurant at one point.

Looks like it was purchased by the McDonald's Corporation in 1986 (not 1985). They were going to tear down the house and build a typical McDonald's restaurant, but people in New Hyde Park and the Town of North Hempstead were able to get the place designated an historic landmark.  McDonald's just restored the building, which is cool.

So the place is fancy. And you know what? It makes the food taste better!

Just kidding. It's still shitty. Hey, McDonald's, mayonnaise on a mushroom burger is f*cking gross.

There are also a lot of pics online. But here are mine (including the top pic):