Saturday, March 21, 2009

Zagat, Go Screw Yourself

Got an email from zagat that they've just come out with their World's Top Hotels, Resorts & Spas guide. 

Are you f*cking kidding me? Who f*cking cares? People are just trying to get by these days. So, hey zagat, how about this year you don't release your stupid guide, you clueless assholes? 

The only people who can even afford to go to these places are those pricks at AIG who are getting huge bonuses, paid by you and me, for running their company into the ground. And this guide is just about as tasteless as that fiasco.  

Show some class, douches. 

Saturday, March 07, 2009

Rachel Ray Pics

So I learned this week that Rachel Ray posed for FHM back in 2003. How did I not know about this before?

As I've said in the past, while I can't stand her now, I used to be a fan. But these days she is just waaaaayyyyy overexposed. Enough already. Seriously. (BTW, is bringing up the FHM thing from 6 years ago just a way to pick up the sagging ratings for her stupid talk show? It has to be, right?)

So, if you haven't seen them, below are some of the pics, before Ray became the piglet she is now. What a dirty, little slut. In other words, NICE. As James Bond said in On Her Majesty's Secret Service, I'm feeling "[j]ust a slight stiffness coming on."*

*According to the Wikipedia article on the movie, Bond's line was voted the "Rudest Ever Moment in Any Film." So of course I have to quote it here.

Sunday, March 01, 2009

Review: Asian Moon

Asian Moon is one of those places on Franklin Ave (where I'm hanging out these days) that probably gets 90% of its business from the lunchtime crowds who work nearby. Those Morgan Stanley folks have to eat somewhere I guess. (BTW, their parking lot was packed, PACKED on President's Day! Go home already!)

And because I work nearby, we get lunch from there probably once a week. They have an extensive menu, but we normally order from the "Lunch Specials" section. The entree comes with soup or salad and rice unless you get a noodle dish.

Just about everything I've had there is pretty good: lo mein; sesame chicken; General Tsao's chicken; chow fun; pad thai; and some other things I don't remember. Other people really like the salmon dish and the chicken with mango. Their wanton soup doesn't have that dark, morning pee pee look you see from other places. And the wantons are soft and delicate, not those thick, heavy, lumps of dough. The salad with ginger dressing is good but not great. The hot secretary at our office loves their hot and sour soup and says it's the best she's had. I tried it once but thought it was the most heinous, godawful thing I'd ever tasted.

The only bad experience I've had (besides the hot and sour soup) was the Chow Fun. It tasted fine but didn't sit too well with me afterwards, and I had to make a few trips to the john that afternoon. This could have been totally unrelated, of course.

I made a joke about it to the hot secretary. It went something like this:

Me: So I had the Chow Fun. Turns out it was no fun at all. (Pause for laughter)

Hot Secretary: Get the f*ck away from me.

So the restaurant is a step up from the typical dirty, shitty Chinese places you see all over Long Island. The lunch specials are generally around $7 to $8. Other things on the menu are a little more.

3 out of 5 stars

Asian Moon
825 Franklin Ave.
Garden City, NY 11530